More Than Mended
Welcome
I’m Sheila, and this is where I hope to talk about those hard things that often catch us by surprise and leave us breathless, bewildered, and broken. Things we don’t often talk about beyond brief regards or awkward condolences, like death and grief, broken relationships, abuse, and all the terrible consequences of our sin and/or the sin of others against us.
Whether we acknowledge it or not, those are some of the very things that shape who we are and how we see the world around us. They impact our relationships and our loves. Won’t you join me as we learn how to live more than mended!
Stuck in Pain
The longer we live, the more loss we experience, and the closer the relationship and deeper the love, the more staggering the loss. If you have just suffered a recent loss, whether it was through death, rejection, a broken relationship, or even some other experience, you may wonder if you’ll ever truly be happy again or if you’ll ever feel like laughing, dancing, or celebrating. Don’t worry, you will, but you will also be changed.
However, one thing I have learned is that mending doesn’t often come quickly, and ignoring, burying, or hiding the pain doesn’t help. Maybe you feel you’re stuck in the process and cannot seem to move forward. I know what that feels like, and sometimes we need help to move on. I’m not a counselor and I would not be where I am without the help of my counselor, so I highly recommend professional help if you feel stuck. But it is also helpful to know you’re not alone, and so, while the details of our stories are not exactly the same, perhaps we can encourage each other as we talk about things that are hurtful and hard and how God’s redeeming love really can mend our broken hearts.
My Story
Some losses, like the loss of the little boy I once had, I have been forced to walk through and process -surviving left me no other choice. Other losses, with God’s help, I have walked bravely through – like the death of my son. I’ve repeatedly suffered the loss of a relationship with my youngest son as misunderstanding, drugs, and mental illness, have often left us wounded and divided. And then there are other losses that have left me feeling forever broken, and now, after years – actually decades – of hiding my hurt and wounds, I’m wondering what it will look like if I simply acknowledge abuse, a broken marriage, and suicide as part of my story.
Mending
The Japanese have a process called Kintsugi also known as Kintsukuroi, in which they mend broken china by adding gold or silver flakes to the glue or lacquer used to repair the crack. This adds a glittery sealed crack to the design of the China piece. The object is not to hide the cracks, but simply to make them a beautifully repaired part of the history of the piece. When I stumbled across this process on Wikipedia one day, it touched some wounded part of my heart and brought me to tears. I felt that still, small voice speaking to my heart telling me this is what it looks like to be beautifully broken and to live again more than mended.
So, it is my prayer that we can both learn to live beautifully broken and more than mended. Won’t you join me on this journey?
